Monday, August 8, 2011 9:47 AM

Drama Of My Life

♥Like I said before I like sharing my problems with alliza.. Even till now.. She is like a friend and a sister to me.. On the other hand, I also like sharing my problems with Nickey too cause he will bring smile to everyone faces during bad or good times.. They both are like drama mama to me.. No matter how bad I am at times, they may scold me but at the end of the day, they still love and care for me.. They were once a stranger to me but now they are like my sisters.. They willing to lend a listening ear and they willing to help me out.. I will not forget that day when my sister in law, gave birth to baby Jewel.. They were the ones that accompany me to KK Hospital to see my little Niece.. Feel so Happy that I still have wonderful friends around me..

You may see me as a strong girl but you all are wrong.. I'm very weak and I get emotionally break down easily.. I'm still like before, I like to be alone then I will cry my heart out.. I don't have the courage at all.. Everything about me is so unreal.. I feel like I'm pretending to be someone I'm not.. I am sad that I turn out to be like that.. It really make me hate myself so much..

9:17 AM

Stories that goes on and on

♥Let just start with my visit to the Nursing Home.. My family and I went to visit my mum during Chinese New Year.. I was so excited to see my mum.. Hoping she still remember me.. We were doing visiting at my grandma place but sad to say she wasn't at home.. So we decided to go straight to hougang to see my mum.. It was a long walk to the Nursing Home.. When we reach the place.. My heart was like beating so fast and I was scared.. My brother have to sign in and sign out when we leave.. Then the nurse brought my mum out.. I was so FREAKING shock.. My mum was so skinny and she can't even walk now.. They said her leg is weak, so she have to sit on a wheelchair.. We bought KFC food for her cause most of the food store not open plus we had our lunch at KFC.. She happily ate the food we bought but she never finish it.. Only the drink she finish all up.. See the smile on my mum face.. Bring tears to my eyes.. Is all my fault that my mum is like that.. I never want god to forgive me for what I had done.. My mum doesn't know anything cause she was very poor when she was young so can't afford to go school and she have to help my grandma go around collect newspaper and boxes.. But she did her part as a Mother when I was young.. She never once beat me at all.. As time goes by, my family begin to fall apart, I become very fast apart from my parents but good thing is that my brother and I were very close in the past.. As for now, not anymore.. We are like stranger.. Plus he got his new family.. Anyway, I Miss My Mum badly.. I remember out of anger I said something mean to my
parents.. I said: why did you bring us into this world and make us suffer.. Passing us around
and give other people to take care of us.. We are not a toy.. As usual vuglar language came out of my bloody mouth.. I should be thankful that I'm able to see the world unlike some
babies before they can even see the world, they die inside their mother wombs.. I'm so sinful..